We can all probably remember the excitement we had when we were kids as the end of the school year approached. There was a feeling of endless possibilities, of adventures just around the corner, of long and lazy days of hanging out with friends and having swim parties and backyard barbecues.

For some of us, the summer might have meant a family trip, all piled in and bouncing around like puppies in the back seat of the family station wagon. (This being the days before seat belts were considered a must.) For others, it might have meant simply having free time. (And lots of it.)

But no matter what summer meant to you, chances are it was, at the very least, a change, a transition from "normal life"; from the routine of school to the open freedom of summer. These days though, since we are no longer children, we are probably the one's organizing and packing and getting directions to go on that family vacation. We don't get the chance to sit back and let summer simply come to us. We have to be the ones making it happen. (And it was really so much easier when all we had to do was to show up!) And, most of us don't have that wonderful three months off every summer to sit back and enjoy ourselves before the big push of school starting again in September. In fact, most of us are lucky to have a few precious weeks off per year.

So the question becomes, how can we create our own relaxation, our own vacation, regardless of our schedules? As adults, as real-live grown-up girls, we need to create our own traditions of summer, our own new anticipations.

One great way of figuring out what kinds of traditions and activities you want for your summer is to ask yourself the following: When you look back on this summer, what do you want to be able to say about it? What is a must on your list of fun and relaxing things to do? (A good way to decide what's vital to your list is to ask yourself how you would feel if something on your list didn't happen. Your answer to that will give you an idea of how important that activity is for you) Then start planning what's on that list. Figure out what you wanted to have done, then figure out how to do it. (It's called "working backward.")

This summer, take the opportunity to create some new things to look forward to. Let's bring back the joy of anticipation.

Angela Mohan, licensed M.F.T., has been a practicing therapist for the past 14 years. She has built successful private practices in Los Angeles and Ventura counties, and teaches law and ethics at Pacifica Graduate Institute. Ms. Mohan, often described as a "fun," "enthusiastic," and "lively" speaker, offers seminars at USC, UCLA, Cal State-Los Angeles and Cal State-Long Beach. Ms. Mohan is a published author and served on the Board of Directors for the California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists. Angela enjoys traveling, reading, and watching movies. Send your questions to angela@smartnow.com.